We here at City of Debt consider your right to privacy to be of paramount importance. Because the trust of our users is key to the success of our parody, this Privacy Policy is intended to make you feel as comfortable as possible visiting our website. Before you read through this policy, we suggest that you settle into a comfortable chair and grab a drink from the refrigerator. This policy page is pretty long, and we want you to be comfortable.
This Privacy Policy discloses the privacy practices for www.cityofdebt.com, and any other sites and services related to it. This Privacy Policy provides you with information on our policies regarding:
The Privacy Policy defines Personal Information as information that would allow someone to identify or contact you, including, for example, your full name, address, telephone number, or email address. Personal Information does not allow us to identify specific individuals from aggregate information that, by itself, would recognize the individual persons (such as statistics about how many persons visited our web site last month, or how many visitors are male and how many are female).
This Privacy Policy is a condition of acceptance on the www.cityofdebt.com website and its respective services; by using the site and these services, you agree to be bound by its terms and conditions. If you do not want to be bound by these terms and conditions, please go visit somewhere else on the web, you won’t hurt our feelings.
This policy also only addresses activities from our servers. Other sites (including those to which we may link) and other service providers may have their own policies, which we do not control, and thus are not addressed or controlled by this policy. We encourage you to learn about the privacy policies of each of these companies. However, we also recognize that if every privacy policy were as long as Tolstoy’s War and Peace, then no one would ever be able to actually do anything on the internet. The web would become an online repository of privacy policies—wouldn’t that be cool?
You provide certain Personal Information to us when you register to:
Categories of Personal Information include, but are not limited to:
The City of Debt website (www.cityofdebt.com) will never ask you to provide any of the following information:
You will also be asked to submit Personal Information depending on the payment method you choose when subscribed to one of our services. If you choose to pay for City of Debt services by credit card, you will be required to provide us the name of your credit card issuer, credit card number, billing address, CVV number, and expiration date. If you choose to pay for City of Debt services by check, you will be required to provide us your checking account information. If you choose to pay for City of Debt services by PayPal, you will be required to provide us PayPal account and confirmed billing address. If you wish to pay by cash, you may visit our offices during standard business hours. We cannot break any bills larger than $20, and the cashier does not have the combination to the safe.
We may at some point implement a feature of your browser called a "cookie" to assign a unique number that automatically identifies your computer when you visit the site. A cookie is a piece of text-only data stored on your hard drive. By setting a cookie on our site, you would not have to log in a password more than once, thereby saving time while on our site. If you reject the cookie, you may still use our site. The only drawback to this is that you will be limited in some areas of our site, or may have to enter passwords or identifying information more than once. You can configure your internet browsers to reject cookies in many ways—such as from all websites or cookies that come from third-party websites. Additionally, you may remove the cookies from your system by deleting the files. If you want to toss your unwanted cookies, please consult the help files for your internet browser.
In addition to the login information, we may collect information of a non-personal nature, such as IP addresses, browser types, domain names, software versions, and access times. This information is only used for our internal purposes (such as to improve the site or to customize content).
We may also collect Personal Information from you at other points on our site which require user input. For example, when entering a contest or other promotional event, we may ask for your name, address, telephone number and e-mail address so we can administer the contest and notify winners.
City of Debt, a free-wheeling unincorporated parody group, operates this website through a convoluted series of shell corporations and Enron-esque partnerships. Our corporate headquarters have recently moved from Paragon City to a location beyond most extradition treaties. If you wish to contact us, please write to the following address.
City of Debt
702 Infamy Avenue, Suite 300
Mercy Island, Rogue Isles
Please consult your postmaster for current international postage rates before mailing any documents to us.
Please note that we rarely check our mail, so you may not hear back from us for a long while.
We use your Personal Information to provide you with City of Debt content and services that are tailored specifically to the profile you provide. In connection with the delivery of our services, we may share the Personal Information with third-party partners or vendors who help deliver or administer the services, but they are only permitted to use the information in connection with the delivery or administration of our services. For example, we share your credit card information with a third-party credit card processing company, but that company is not permitted to use the credit card or Personal Information for any purpose other than to fulfill the specific purchase transaction.
Where transactions with a third party are required, City of Debt requires that the intermediary safeguard your Personal Information that is in accordance with this privacy policy.
We use your information on an aggregated basis (not personally identifiable) to do such things as operate our site, enhance our site and sell and deliver messages. We may disclose aggregated information about our users, but that information contains no Personal Information.
Although your privacy is very important to us, due to legal rules beyond our control, we cannot fully ensure that your private communications and other Personal Information will not be disclosed to third parties. For example, we may be forced to disclose information to the government or third parties under certain circumstances, or third parties may unlawfully intercept or access transmissions or private communications. Additionally, in the unlikely event we need to investigate or resolve possible problems or inquiries, we can, and you authorize us to, disclose any information about you to law enforcement or other government officials as we, in our sole discretion, believe necessary or appropriate. In addition, we may share Personal Information with our contractors on a need-to-know basis in order to maintain our services provided that such contractors have agreed to the non-disclosure and confidentiality requirements we require of our employees.
In order to protect the privacy interests of younger Internet users, we do not allow children under the age of 18 to use our services without the consent of their parents.
If you are over the age of 18, you can still go ask your parents for permission to visit this website. However, they may just sigh and roll their eyes.
If you are a parent with a child under the age of 18, we encourage you to sit down together and read this privacy policy. Most children will fall fast asleep. However, if your child takes an enthusiastic interest in the minutae of privacy policies, COPPA policies, and disclaimers, then your child may aspire to a career in the exciting field of internet law.
You can control the content of your Personal Information by following the instructions stated below in Section 6.
Please note that if you provide any information on your own or directly to parties who provide service to our web site or any other sites you encounter on the Internet (even if these sites are branded with our branding), different rules may apply to their use or disclosure of the Personal Information you disclose to them. We encourage you to investigate and ask questions before disclosing information to third parties.
To review and update your Personal Information stored with City of Debt, please go here.
You are given the opportunity to 'opt-in' to having your information used for purposes not directly related to our site at the point where we ask for the information. For example, our registration form may include an 'opt-in' mechanism so only those users who wish to share Personal Information with companies other than City of Debt can authorize distribution of that information to third parties.
You may also 'opt-out' of these additional services. We like giving you choices. So sing along with us!
You click the 'opt-in'. You click the 'opt-out'. You click the 'opt-in' and shake your mouse about. You do the hokey-pokey, and you give a little shout. That's what privacy policies are all about!
City of Debt takes precautions to protect our users' information. When users submit sensitive information via our website, that information is protected both online and off-line.
We have established and maintain reasonable security procedures to protect the confidentiality, security and integrity of your Personal Information. We use encryption, Secure Socket Layers, and other technical measures (such as off-site backup, security testing, and password protection), and we implement off-line efforts to further protect this information, including limiting employee access to Personal Information and updating our employees regarding our security practices and privacy policies. Please recognize, however, that "perfect security" does not exist on the Internet.
When our registration and personal profile forms ask users to enter sensitive information, that information is protected using industry-standard SSL encryption. While on a secure page, the lock icon on the bottom of Web browsers such as Netscape Navigator and Microsoft Internet Explorer becomes locked, as opposed to un-locked, or open, when you are just 'surfing.'
The City of Debt Privacy Policy is subject to change at any time. Since we’re parodists, we like changing things on a whim. We may have even changes this privacy policy while you were reading this page. You could reload this page and re-read it again. Print out both copies and compare the documents side-by-side.
We encourage you to review this document regularly for any future changes.
If you have any questions about the security at our website or facilities, you can send an email to support@cityofdebt.com. We won't promise to respond to your e-mail, but sure, write us if it makes you feel more comfortable.
Remember, we want you to feel comfortable when you visit our website.
You’re almost to the end of our privacy policy. It’s probably time to get out of your comfy chair and go to the refrigerator for another drink.
This privacy policy is effective as of December 9, 2005, and it was brought to you by the letter “x” and the imaginary number i.